BENN GLECK: If You Don't Like It in the Empire, Move to Hutt Space!

Senior Outer-Rim Analyst Benn Gleck on the cover of his new datapad issue: 'Arguing With Aliens'

HNN Senior Outer Rim Analyst Benn Gleck tells it like it is:

Dear fellow civilized human beings,

The Rebellion wants to go back to a time when the aliens were allowed to run things.

All of us old enough to remember know what that is like. It was a galaxy of "maker" humans doling out resources for "taker" aliens living off Republic handouts.

Yeah, if I was an alien, I'd like that too.

But even the aliens of the Republic needed humans to run things; to make the magtrains run on time. Because what does a regime where the aliens are really in full control look like?

We don't need to imagine it. We just need to look at Hutt Space to know what that's like. There's a place where aliens would love to make exemplary for the rest of the galaxy; a place where aliens own human sex slaves who pleasure their salacious desires. In their heart, that's what every alien wants: a human sex slave.

If the rebels manage to take control and turn back the clock on galactic progress that's what we're going to have. Not only are working aliens going to be put on unemployment and welfare, but their welfare package is going to include human sex slaves; human sex slaves and spice; human sex slaves, spice, and more free credits than they can spend on greasy nerfburgers making them as lazy and fat as the Hutts they want to emulate.

Don't think that's true? Just look at Hutt Space! That's the alien utopia the rebels really want. That's what's going to happen to the Empire if they ever could take over.

In fact, if you don't like it in the Empire, why don't you just move to Hutt Space!

But the rebels won't, will they? They know that they've got it good in human-run space, because they know that only humans can run a thriving society. And so they fight just so that they can give the fruits of that thriving society to the aliens they love.